Seriously...

~ Posted on Thursday, January 13, 2011 at 9:53 AM ~

Seriously folks...

I have no idea how many times I've said this, how many times I've explained this, and yet people still have the perception that just because I'm a SAHM, it means I stay at home all the time, that I get all the rest I can, that I'm the free-est person in the whole wide world, that they can just tell me to help them do things and stuff.

Seriously... I'm tired of all this crap.

I am human. I'm not a super woman.

I do get tired.

I do get sick (though I'd really prefer not to and I thank God my hubby and sometimes MIL helps out to take care of Ben when I'm sick).

I do sometimes wish I could go out and spend some 'me' time.

I do want to eat slowly and enjoy my food like how I used to even though it means I have to eat alone with no company.

People who are single, or are not married, or do not have any children or do not have experience taking care of a child (for at least one whole day), they think I get it very easy in life.

They think that I just sit at home, mop around, play with my boy all day long. ALL DAY LONG.

They think just because they freaking had to go to work and encounter and face clients, users, vendors, bosses etc etc that their life is worse than mine.

Seriously.

When YOU feel sick, you get to apply for leave and rest at home.

But what about me? What do I do when I fell sick? Do I get to apply for leave and rest at home ALL DAY LONG?

Seriously.

When YOU think you're so busy with work, please think that once you go home, your work is over (sorry if you're the type of people who brings work home)

And think that how you look forward to weekend so that you can relax and wind down after a hard week at work.

But what about me? When I'm overwhelmed with taking care of my boy ALL DAY LONG, do I get to go home (oh wait... I AM HOME ALL THE TIME!) and rest?

Do I get to look forward to weekend and all? Everyday is the same thing for us.

Seriously.

Think about what I had to go through before you go and make smart opinions of other people's life.

Especially a stay-at-home mum's life.

(Image taken from Google search)

You have no idea how 'FREE' we are at home 24/7.

You have no idea that even a 10 minutes shower is considered a luxury. (I normally shower with my boy to save time and so I don't have to worry he'll get into any mischief if I bath myself and when I do bath myself, I had to leave the bathroom door open so I can keep an eye on my boy)

You have no idea that even eating alone is a luxury.

You have no idea when you're at your most hungriest and yet you have to feed your child first,  and then have to juggle in watching after him as well when you finally get to eat your portion just so that he doesn't throw or cause a mess at the eating table.

So seriously...

The next time I fall sick, if you are not even caring enough to wish me a 'take care' or a 'get well soon' or 'take a rest' or 'drink more water', please just keep quiet and leave me alone.

I do not need to know your opinion that I have all the time in the world to rest since I'm a stay-at-home mum.

When I'm struggling to conserve my energy so that I really do not fall sick, I do not want to read or hear or know all this  opinions.

I really don't need to hear all this demotivating things at the moment when I should be resting and concentrating on getting well.

So yeah, go away if you've got nothing good to say.

Comments (25) -

Catheryn  @ Pink Bibs

And I SERIOUSLY support you with 2 hands and 2 legs!

And it is really annoying to be mis-assumed by others who has no slight idea of how hard our 'job' is.  Sigh.

choo

I pray hard that my girl dun wake up in the middle of my shitting.

Louise

*thumbs up*
Stay strong Jenny! You're doin well, keep up the good work Smile Ignore the nonsense (I'm curious who are those ppl that made your life miserable Tong )

Rosse

SAHM is really a very tiring job yet some people have no idea what it's like to be one! ask that person to reverse the situation for a day or two then he/she will understand. Tried it with my hubby...he ended up not eating & bath  the whole day! And  my baby only wearing diapers when  i get home!

Jenny @ I'm a full-time mummy

Catheryn,
Yes, so demotivating to know that friends and even family members think of that!

Choo,
Thank you for your comment in my blog! I'm so touched to know you commented! Smile Ermm... as for the part on our kid waking up in the middle of our 'process'... been there done that...

Jenny @ I'm a full-time mummy

Hi Louise!
Oh these ppl didn't make my life miserable... they just make me feel sad that they don't understand what we go through.. So I'm just trying to educate these ppl who are not married, no kids, no experience taking care of kids that we SAHM really is not just relaxing whole day long at home... Thanks for your support! Smile

Hello Rosse!
Oh wow! I hope your hubby does not get scared of the idea of caring for your child again! Thanks for your comment support! Smile

Cindy

Absolutely awesome post! We mothers have no time to pee, poo or eat. Reading newspapers is a luxury. SAHMs do an awesome job and that job is not any easier (if not harder) than that of a working mother. Don't let their comments get to you. Stay well!

thesavvymummy

Ya, people won't realize how difficult unless they try for themselves!

Rosse, your comment is so cute! Wearing only diapers when u got home???

Jenny @ I'm a full-time mummy

Hi Cindy!
Oh yes! Thanks for adding the reading newspaper is a luxury part too! Nowadays, I read newspaper online, that also only on the main news featured in the country. Thank you for your comment support!

Hi thesavvymummy!
Agree! It's so easy for people to give comments when they've never experience it themselves! Thanks for your comment support!

Marj

I realized your point in this article when I myself stayed at home to take care of my daughter.  We truly need to work 24/7.  We can't have a leave because we are already tired or sick.  However, having this opportunity is a great blessing.  My father once told me that not all women can be a mother.  That's why I cherish every moment I have with my daughter.

Jenny @ I'm a full-time mummy

Hello Marj!
Thanks for dropping by and commenting! It's such a joy to have so many support from you guys! I love what your father said! Smile

Boobies

AMEN SISTA!!! You took the words right outta my mouth!

Jenny @ I'm a full-time mummy

Hey Boobies!
Thank you for coming over! Again, I wish you a speedy recovery!

Elysia

Oooo this is such a hot button issue! And being a SAHM, I completely feel for you. No, we never do get a true break. Showers are a luxury. Eating alone...what's that? A full, un-interrupted sleep? Nooooo. So why do I feel guilty when people ask me if I work? Yes! I undoubtedly work. No...I don't get paid for it, atleast not in any currency currently recognized in any country. Keep on keepin on, mama!

Tracy

Hey babe,
I hope you're alright by now. I think we have to put a deaf ear to the things people said that could dampen our spirits. Throughout my journey with breastfeeding and taking care of baby, I've heard tonnes of negative comments coming from people who I thought I could depend on...it hurts. A lot.

Stay strong mummy...I always wish I could be a SAHM...

Jenny @ I'm a full-time mummy

Hi Elysia!
Thank you for your comment support! Smile

Jenny @ I'm a full-time mummy

Hi Tracy!
I'm better now though yes, I am falling sick officially now... Thanks for your comment support btw! Smile

Miki Chua

i couldn't agree more with every single word u hv to write..
sometimes i'm too tired too and ppl wouldn't know bcoz they think that we juz look at our kids whole day!

Lisa

AMEN! So true Jenny. Its actually easier going to work! Hang in there Jenny.

Lynette

Totally agreed with this post Jenny! I once had people told me I should be able to do everything I did when I wasn't a mum. Said it's about time management and planning. Well we could only zip our mouth and pray when their day come the long awaited apologies will come too...

eeling

YES!YES! this is so...TRUE!!! I totally agreed too! Coz I'm a Full time mummy too...., it is really hurt when parents said I'm free at home all day!!! HEllo... I have 3 kids! and they are just 10, 7, 4 years old kids! I got to fetch them to school, tuition, cook for them...n etc! I agree Lynette comments... "Their day come the long awaited" will come true!  

Jenny @ I'm a full-time mummy

Hi Miki!
Yeah, in a sense, we are looking at our kids whole day!!! Like jaga lembu what! Tong

Hi Lisa!
Thanks for your comment support!

Hi Lynette!
Oh well, when I wasn't a mum, I was a multitasker, finishing up my jobs and assignments ASAP, now that I'm a mummy, I tried to do the same too. But anyway, back to this people, yeah, wait until their turn comes! Hehehe...

Hello eeling!
Wow! 3 kids?!! Respect, respect! How do you manage? Btw, I tried to reply you via email with regards to your comment on my breastfeeding post (something about weaning at later age) but it bounced back my emails. Hope you get to read my reply here.

aurie

wow - i miss a few days and whoa!  i'm hoping you are feeling better!!  thanks for posting what I think most sahm's want to say Smile

Cloth Diaper Malaysia

When my friends ask me what am I currently doing (knowing pretty well that I'm SAHM, but they ask anyway) - THEN, they answer it themselves - "Full-time housewife?"

I'd answer: "Yeah.... Actually, I'm a full time mummy or home manager aka chef aka decorator aka organizer aka bla bla bla...

And they'll be like, "Woooow..... every girls dream job......"

Oh reeeeeeeeally?????! Let's see them have it a go!!

Jenny @ I'm a full-time mummy

Hi Aurie!
Nah, just ranting out my own frustrations of people's misconceptions about us SAHMs... I'm feeling better already btw! Thanks! Laughing

Hi Cloth Diaper Malaysia!
Oh yes, the grass always looks greener on the other side! Wait until their turn come eh? Hehehe... thanks for your comment support btw! Smile

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